I’ve noticed my posts have become so spontaneous but when I write these kinds of posts it’s usually a topic that I’ve been thinking about A LOT so here goes.
Ladies, Ladies, Ladies! – You are beautiful, we are beautiful and our position in this world is second to none.
Taking a moment to sit out away from the female species its marvelling and I just want to cover a few topics, I am going to cover mentality, self –worth and careers.
First of mentality, this is certainly something I have been trying to perfect over the last few years and whilst nothing can be perfect, I try to lead by my mentality. I generally am someone that carries a can do attitude with an extremely positive outlook on life – do not mistake that with naivety or absentmindedness but a particular outlook I think is needed today. It’s sad that so often women downplay their talents, bring down other women or wash women’s statures away with unprovoked comments and it truly has to stop. A truly beautiful woman knows that true strength; happiness and positivity come from striving in her own successes but also being there to lift up her fellow women. What is there to gain from stripping away another woman of her beauty? Whether that is physical, mental or spiritual, that is not you’re right or purpose. Granted comments can be said in passing but your “right” to tear down anyone else is unnecessary. Believe in your own success and focus on your own purpose and be intelligent, when you are truly absorbed by your own path you find that you become at peace with yourself as well as other women around you. Shake of any negativity that burdens you and go for what you want!
That last line brings me into this section on careers, and in all honesty this millennial generation have got it the hardest. Careers are lucrative, jobs are everywhere and so is the passion, it is not necessarily down the academic route as our parents and grandparents would have experienced. I constantly see the academic. Vs. creative argument everywhere and as a young Black woman growing up with Caribbean parents, a “creative” career was not necessarily at the top of our conversations when it came to jobs. Hence my degree in English literature and masters in Journalism but one thing that my degree’s have taught me is that I LOVE to write and I read a crazy amount of books. Despite that, not every one is set upon the path that follows the strictness of academia and I think that’s where the difficulty comes into it. Our generation has created a completely new outlook on making money, we our statistically known as the DIY generation, we have created jobs and made money from them and whilst that has its upsides, it certainly can be a burden. I often scroll through twitter and see comments by a range of women (and men) and know so many people that do not know what they want to do with their career – its often the case of a child in a candy shop? So much choice and what path do we want to take? Answer: there is no set way. Some people survive of being multi-talented and to be quite honest it is probably the best way to succeed either as an employee or an entrepreneur. Take your time to decide what you want to do; there is no rush – in a generation where speed is key as our patience is non-existent. Not knowing is okay as long as in the meantime you are exploring and finding the answers or keys to your skillset.
This is probably the part I am most passionate about and this will link into dating, men and relationships. I do find this is a topic I think about a lot and discuss an awful lot with friends etc. but I don’t think I am the only one. To get a point across my ideals are my own ideals and what I believe – so when it comes to relationships as I’ve discussed in a previous post, I treasure. I don’t settle and I REFUSE to waste time in a situation that causes me nothing but turmoil, I believe relationships still can exist for the lifetime of the individuals and that is probably an ode to the relationships I have around me, anyway I digress. I like to take my time when it comes to dating, seeing guys etc. because what is the rush? Stages are meant for progress so to measure that compatibility it is important to understand that person and how they tick on as many levels as possible. I see SO many women running into a situation without gathering everything that is there before getting hurt. Although I am an advocate for experiencing something and having fun, if you get hurt at least you have learnt something from the experience but at the same time there is a difference between this kind of experience and running into a situation with one eye closed. In essence you are embarking on an experience or journey with another individual, that’s your time, your emotions and your happiness so for one, be 100% in love with yourself because it will be sad to loose yourself and secondly know your self-worth. When I am talking about self-worth understand that you deserve the best and you should not settle for nonsense. I do believe in the King and Queen image, but its not the richness or soppiness that the instagram handle has on it, I take the definitions that come with it as sacred, as a Queen you should be earn, appreciated and worked for – do not give into every text of “ I miss you, come round” – for who? (This is not made as a stush comment but a self worth idea), and women have a responsibility of being the “Queen” by a man’s side, as I have said relationships today are too throw away, but we need to focus on ourselves and that way we know our self worth and what we should stand for and what we shouldn’t. The best way to express it is, if your heart and self-worth was plant or a child witihin itself, you would want to nurture it, love it and give it the absolute so when your heart and self-worth is within you – why do you treat it differently? Know your worth and if you don’t, work and focus on yourself because entering an experience without knowing yourself and knowing value is a recipe for disaster.
Just some food for thought.